He’s Just Not That Into You (2004) by Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo is the book the film of the same name is based on.
The book basically is a dating advice book for women who date men. It is light and funny in parts and that’s the good bit of it but I wasn’t crazy about the book. It felt like people were being put into stereotypical roles based on their gender instead of being fully rounded people with emotions, feelings, hopes and dreams. The idea represented in this book is that people should not change themselves for their partner. So far so good. But then the book encourages readers to change their partner. It puts that across as powerful but there is nothing powerful in the second part of that. I think the first part of that advice is excellent but the second part of that should be the same. We are all looking for mutual respect in a relationship and for people to love us all for who we are. That goes both ways. The idea that in order to build your own confidence up by tearing away someone’s else’s confidence feels very ugly. As I said the book is very stereotypical and puts people into boxes. Every woman wants something serious, every man doesn’t. The book never takes into consideration that women date for a variety of reasons (men do too but the advice is for women) and that at different times in a woman’s life a woman might not always be looking for love so I think the book should have made clear that it was for a woman who was looking for something serious. The advice really felt very dated. The advice isn’t bad if you are in a situation like what is described in the book but it felt like it was being put across as advice which applied to all situations where a woman and a man were dating and that is simply not true. I think if someone followed this advice in quite a lot of situations I think they could throw away something very good with someone.
I felt like women who dated men were all made out to be waiting by the phone for the man to call all day and constantly were thinking about how to make it work with the man. Meanwhile the man wasn’t thinking about them at all. Women who date men have other things in their lives bar thinking about whether a man is into them or not and that wasn’t really taken into consideration. It felt like women were being made out to be damsels in distress who hung on every signal the man gave out but never understood any of the signals right. And then on the other side men who date women are always doing things out of badness. It never is even considered that there is introverted men who date women in the world and that some of things might not be as easy for them, that it doesn’t necessarily mean that they aren’t into the woman. Women also apparently shouldn’t make the first move with a man which I don’t agree with at all. The book even suggests domestic violence means the man isn’t into the woman which of course is true but is a very serious situation. To dismiss it as he’s just not that into you as opposed to saying there is a problem with him does feel like domestic violence is made out to be a smaller thing than it obviously is and that it is in situations where in reality someone who does that to a person will do that to the next person too because they are abusers. The book claims to be helping women take control of their relationships but it is repeated in the book that “if a guy wants you he will make it happen because guys get what they want” so it seems to contradict its message. That sounds like women are being put in a passive role where how they feel about the man doesn’t matter and that’s supposed to not be what the book is about. There is some good advice in here if a woman is dating a man who is a player and very obnoxious but the advice doesn’t help in any other situation where a woman is dating a man. It is really old-fashioned advice and very out of place for a modern world where everyone should be treated equally and not stereotyped.
To purchase He’s Just Not That Into You By Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo go to:
Astrology For Dummies (1999) by Rae Orion is a very interesting book.
It is a really good guide for explaining astrology to a complete beginner. I found it a really intriguing read and enjoyed getting to learn more about astrology through the book. I don’t believe in astrology but I do find it incredibly interesting and fun to read about so I was very entertained by this book. There was lots of romance and life in the book through an astrological lens and the explanations about the information such as planets, houses and what terms meant was very accessible and explained very well.
I think it was very well put together and researched. I felt like there was a lot of passion for the subject from the author which is always great to see in writing. I think when an author loves what they are writing about it really shows and makes readers enjoy the book more too and that is very clear with this author and this book. I think the book is definitely more for beginners than someone who knows a lot about astrology but I think it could be a fun and interesting recap for readers who know more about the topic.
A really great read.
To purchase Astrology For Dummies by Rae Orion go to:
Stephen Gately and Boyzone: Blood Brothers (2010) by Emily Herbert is a great read.
The book tells of the story of Boyzone star Stephen Gately. Included in the book is his childhood, his family life and rise to fame with Boyzone as well as his career after the band before his untimely death in 2009.
Stephen was always my favourite member of Boyzone and actually my first ever crush so I was really interested to read his story. He came across very likeable, seemed to appreciate the opportunities he was given and always was very good with his fans. He seemed very determined to make his dreams come through and worked very hard to do so. I found the book really interesting and the photo section with photographs from his life and career was great.
The book is really well-written and though I knew a lot about Stephen’s career and life I felt like I learned more from reading this book.
To purchase Stephen Gately and Boyzone: Blood Brothers by Emily Herbert go to:
Philip Lynott: Renegade of Thin Lizzy (2012) by Alan Byrne tells the story of Thin Lizzy frontman Phil Lynott.
The book talks about Phil’s life before Thin Lizzy, his rise to fame with the band and his work as a solo artist after before his untimely death in 1986. The book also speaks about his family life. There is also a fantastic photo section with lots of photographs from his life and career.
I am a really huge Thin Lizzy fan so this was certainly a book I was really looking forward to reading and I loved it. I think there was a lot about Phil as a person in the book as well as an artist so there was a good balance there. I loved reading about his love of poetry and his early days on the music scene in Dublin.
The book shows how Phil was an interesting, funny, deep and dedicated man and I love how he had all those amazing traits which people don’t always think go together but which do. He seemed a really likeable person. Very down-to-earth. I could relate a lot to Phil in so many ways and his determination to succeed was very inspiring. I certainly felt very inspired that I could succeed too while reading this book.
The book is very well-written with a lot of research done. Many interviews were done with people who knew Phil and it was very interesting to see how they saw him from each of their perspectives.
Amazing read. Loved it.
To purchase Philip Lynott: Renegade of Thin Lizzy go to:
Basically …: My Life as a Real Essex Girl (2013) is a great read.
In the book about her life Gemma discusses her childhood, her experience of being bullied, her heartbreak in relationships, her work in Towie (The Only Way Is Essex) and her work prior to being cast on the show. She also speaks about being body confident and about her road to confidence in her life.
I really enjoyed this book. It is very relatable. There is a lot of fun moments which made me laugh. There was also a lot of heartbreaking moments which were heart-wrenching. Her honesty and openness throughout this book made it so easy to relate to her and made the book a really excellent and interesting read. Gemma comes across very likeable and down-to-earth.
An excellent read.
To purchase Basically…: My Life as a Real Essex Girl by Gemma Collins go to:
Teach Yourself Reflexology (1995) is a great book.
The book is part of the Teach Yourself books and explains what Reflexology is and how to do different techniques and where the points are to apply pressure. There is a lot of handy diagrams to help readers with how to achieve these goals. It did feel like this book was intended for everyone including beginners and to an extent it was but it does feel that very quickly you are being thrown a bit in at the deep end. There is preparation to give the author their due but once the techniques start there is a lot to process one after the other. I think there could have been more time given to the different techniques.
However I do understand that there was a lot to get through here and that the author was trying to give us as much knowledge as possible. I did find the book interesting apart from that. I found the content interesting and the diagrams helpful. It is an excellent book but I think it is an excellent book for people who are more familiar with the techniques of reflexology as opposed to complete beginners. The book seems amazing from my limited knowledge of reflexology but it does feel like it would be more useful to an audience which was more intermediate or beginners even with a certain amount of knowledge. I think this could be a great book for them but not complete beginners so much.
All in all though I did enjoy it and it was a very good and interesting read.
To purchase Teach Yourself Reflexology by Chris Stormer go to:
For more about Chris Stormer and their work go to:
How To Stop Worrying And Start Living (1944) by Dale Carnegie is an excellent self-help book.
This book attempts to do what the title suggests and shows readers how worry, doubt and fear are major barriers to living your life to the full in eight sections. There is amazing advice in the book like concentrating on today and the moment instead of worrying about things which have happened in the past or about what the future holds and believing in your ability to solve your worries. The book speaks about how worrying obsessively is a pattern which we have built up in our minds but it can be knocked back down with practice and effort. Readers are also advised to enjoy the everyday things in order to be more fulfilled and happy.
There is so much excellent advice here but readers do still need to put the effort into trying to change their mindset and the patterns and destructive habits of thoughts in their minds. That of course can be difficult but the author has certainly done a great job here of advising readers and helping them to take those difficult but life-changing steps.
To purchase How To Stop Worrying And Start Living by Dale Carnegie go to:
Bullies very often bully people because the person is different. But to be more precise bullies bully people who are different because they don’t like people being different. Speaking about the mindset of bullies is not something I could put in a general way because there is different reasons. I have never been a bully myself so thankfully I have not personal experience of the mindset but been bullied myself for years has certainly giving me an insight into how bullies think and operate. I am a writer, I observe, they didn’t bank on that one! 🙂 To be really clear bullies bully because of so-called norms in society. Nearly every person who has ever been bullied has a near same story of being bullied for being different to what is the supposed norm in society and my story in no different. My experience was being introverted in a world where being extroverted and assertive is valued and put above introversion as the ‘right’, ‘valid’ and ‘superior’ way of being. You could put so many things into that same sentence and it’s a very similar story. Examples:
My experience was being black in a world where being white is valued and put above being black as the ‘right’, ‘valid’ and ‘superior’ way of being.
My experience was being trans in a world where being cis is valued and put above being trans as the ‘right’, ‘valid’ and ‘superior’ way of being.
And look there is countless examples but bullying at its heart almost always boils down to the fact that bullies think they are better than those they bully in some way. Are bullies insecure? Yes. Do they also have big egos? Yes. A bully is insecure that a different way to theirs is happening so they bully people to stop that person from being proud of who they are. They also have big egos because they believe who they are is how everyone should be. Other aspects come into the reason why those who bully bully like jealousy but most of the time bullying at heart is about difference and about a difference which is not harming the bully. People are taught to think they are superior in some way by family and/or society but there is also something within them which bullies. It is a mixture of the two things. There is a power dynamic to situations where people are being bullied. The bully wants power. The bully thinks they have a right to bully that person because they see them as inferior. They think the person is fair game and they do not believe that the person has any right to stand up to them. They think they deserve it just for being who they are. They may see the person they bully as an easy target because family and/or society has made them believe that person is weak. They may see the person they bully as a strong target who they don’t think should be proud of themselves and they want to tear them down so they no longer are proud. They may start off thinking they are weak and realise they aren’t and therefore their ugly goals about that person change. I do think the role of difference to supposed norms is extremely important to understand in regards to bullying. It is that mindset of what I am is valid and right and what you are isn’t which leads to bullying.
A bully doesn’t also understand when people stand up for their rights. No one should have to go into a room where they are targeted by bullies for being who they are. No one should ever feel uncomfortable for being who they are. They should feel as relaxed as anyone else in that room. Simple as that. When people stand up to bullies there is often dangerous territory they go into. Some bullies get a kick out of it which encourages them to bully more because they feel like they are getting to that person. Other bullies play the victim. They act like they are being bullied. Why? Because it goes back to thinking they are superior again. They think they have a right to be hurtful to people they see as ‘other’ and not as good as them. But that person has to be bullying them in their mind because they have no right in their minds to challenge anything about them. It’s a mindset of they should know their place which is really rather disgusting and to be honest a huge insult to people like myself who have genuinely faced bullying in their lives to be maintaining that they are being bullied.
Here is my latest Beauty On A Budget look. Hope you all like it. 🙂
Use Miss Beauty London’s Sweet Touch powder on your face and neck. Brush eyebrows and put the black colour from Max & More’s 12 Color Eyeshadow Palette on your eyebrows and under your eyes. Put the light gray colour from the same palette on your eyelids. Put Miss Beauty London’s False Lash Effect Mascara – Black on your eyelashes. Put on OG Outdoor Girl Blusher on your cheeks.
Put Miss Beauty London’s Matte Lipstick – Blackberry on your lips. Put Miss Beauty London’s Lipstick Sealer over it.