Friday Fictioneers: Half-Brothers

 

 

 

 

 

 

Half-Brothers

 

Bryce wasn’t sure what to expect when he arrived at the train tracks in Michigan. He just had a nice meal with his estranged father and his new family. No one addressed the elephant in the room. The twenty-five plus years. His skateboarding half-brother made his feelings clear by not attending and coming here instead.

‘Chas, hey …’

‘You’re the son my Dad didn’t want.’

Chas continued skateboarding.

‘I’m not here to cause trouble or take your Dad away from you.’

‘Why are you here?’

‘Because I need to know where I came from.’

‘California, dude, so go home, yeah?’

 

My book Black Coat based on a previous Friday Fictioneers prompt is available at:

 

For Friday Fictioneers Writing Prompt. Check out the website at:

https://rochellewisoff.com/

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46 comments on “Friday Fictioneers: Half-Brothers

  1. 4963andypop says:

    Nice description of the awkward proprietary reactions of previously insular families, to newly-disclosed family members.

    The last line confused me at first, partially, for the lack of commas, but also because i have never heard an American use “mate” in this way. Maybe it’s youthful jargon, that I’m notfamiliar with, but I thought youd want to know that it rang a bit false and un-American. 😊 otherwise great, and please forgive me i’m just out of touch!

  2. jillyfunnell says:

    You can’t close a gap of twenty-five years in one day. I hope their relationship can become something that holds happiness for both of them.

  3. Alice Audrey says:

    Simple answers come from simple minds, but you can’t tell him that.

  4. granonine says:

    Lots of dynamics going on here. Lots of story in just a few words. Good one.

  5. plaridel says:

    it doesn’t look good. maybe he can just go back to california to keep the peace.

  6. Ouch. These siblings pull no punches.

  7. Abhijit Ray says:

    So much animosity even after twenty five years?

  8. Sandra says:

    Well that was a welcome and a half! Brutal.

  9. Kestril Trueseeker says:

    Chilly farewell. I hope that even though his half brother was awful Bryce managed to find something worthwhile about the trip.

  10. Dear Lisa,

    How sad that after 25 years they couldn’t reconcile. Well done.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

  11. Love the dialogue – it subtly says so much about their feelings in a an oblique way. Nicely done.

  12. Iain Kelly says:

    Not an easy situation for anyone to deal with, I can understand his cold reception, but hope it will work out in the end.

  13. draliman says:

    I fear this is one fence which will never be mended. Nice one

  14. Reblogged this on By the Mighty Mumford and commented:
    GOOD YARN—GREAT PHOTO—I’M A TRAIN TRACK NUT!

  15. jwdwrites says:

    I like this story, some things are just meant to stay broken. Nicely done. 🙂

  16. pennygadd51 says:

    I love this story, Lisa, because the emotions are mixed and subtle. Chas is antagonistic, yes, but the fact that he’s talking at all to Bryce is a little chink through which friendship and even brotherly love could one day flourish. Kudos!

  17. Violet Lentz says:

    Short and acerbic.. Love it!

  18. Laurie Bell says:

    Gosh family can be difficult.

  19. Sounds just like a boy who is afraid his dad might leave him like the dad left his half-brother. Nicely done.

  20. James McEwan says:

    Let it go, no one needs the hassle…

  21. There are bridges that will always stay broken…

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